AEW Dynamite Results – March 23, 2022
We are live from the H-E-B Center in Cedar Park, Texas!
Match #1. CM Punk vs. Dax Harwood
Punk is out to a hero’s welcome as Cash Wheeler lets Harwood take this one on himself. Couple of arm drags by Punk to start as the Gunn Club cheers on from ringside. Harwood lands a cheap back elbow in the corner and follows up with some HEAVY chops. More arm drags by Punk as he cinches in a top wrist lock. Harwood with a snap suplex and a leg drop for a two count. Back breaker by Dax followed by a snot rocket and I’m grossed out. Punk attempts a sleeper but back suplex by Dax. Harwood with some more chops in the corner but Dax is distracted by the Gunn Club, as is everyone else. Both men trade shots in the center and Punk gets the better of it. Punk goes up top but gets caught by Harwood, however Punk fights him off and drops the Savage… no! Dax jumps up and knocks Punk’s legs out from under him. Harwood then delivers a Barry Windham-esque superplex from the top! The feed cuts out for a second, but we come back and Dax with a diving headbutt off the top! One, two, NO! Cash Wheeler is back at ringside as both Punk and Harwood crash and burn over the top rope in a double suplex. Punk gets up first as he goes to the top and delivers a perfect crossbody block off the top! Two count! Both men trade rolling cradles and Harwood NEARLY gets the three. Punk looking for the rising knee in the corner but Harwood catching him, slingshot powerbomb! Another near fall! Punk up and Irish whip’s Harwood in the corner, rising knee strike to the back of the head! Punk looking for the GTS but Harwood catches him and locks in a sharp shooter! Punk fights out to the ropes and rolls through into the Anaconda Vice! Harwood taps! What an awesome match that highlighted Harwood as a singles wrestler, but Punk is proving he can change his style and still be one of the best in the world.
Winner: CM Punk
Rating: ***3/4
Chris Jericho says the Dark Order won’t be able to hang with the JAS, but they will elevate them by being in the ring with them. Daniel Garcia says he’s going to prove that pro wrestling could never beat sports entertainment.
Match #2. Eight Man Tornado Tag Match: Jeff Hardy, Matt Hardy, Darby Allin, & Sting vs. Andrade Family Office (Isiah Kassidy, Marq Quen, The Butcher, & The Blade)
This match is also anything goes, so I’m going to do my best here. Darby takes out the Butcher and the Blade with a dive as Sting jumps off the top rope to the outside being he’s the GOAT. Jeff Hardy takes Blade over the railing and into the crowd. Butch, Blade, Sting, Jeff, and Darby make their way up the steps into the crowd. Butch picks up Darby in a powerbomb position and swings him into the steel railing, then TOSSES THE MAN DOWN A FLIGHT OF STAIRS. We go to picture-in-picture as Blade and Sting are fighting in the concessions outside. Butch is dragging a lifeless Darby through the fans. Matt Hardy is with Private Party fighting on the ramp. Matt with a slam on Kassidy on the ramp. Hardy looking for the Side Effect off the stage but Quen is there to deliver the low blow. Private Party deliver a double Side Effect through a table off the stage to Matt Hardy! Sting has Butch on a table in the concession area while Jeff Hardy climbs an obnoxiously high ladder! Holy cow. Hardy climbs to some ledge about 12 feet off the ground and delivers a swanton bomb to both Butch and Blade! Sting makes his way back to the ring to assist Matt Hardy but Isiah Kassidy hits him with a chair! No sell by Sting! Sting-ing up! Sting misses a Stinger Splash and Private Party set up Gin & Juice to Sting! Sting catches Quen in a Scorpion Death Drop, stumbles, and climbs back up, there’s Matt Hardy! Matt and Sting make eye contact. Twist of fate and Scorpion Death Drop in stereo! That’s all she wrote! That was a fun, all out, chaotic sprint that did not overstay it’s welcome. The nostalgia may wear off at some point, but I don’t think it’ll happen anytime soon.
Winners: Sting, Darby Allin, Matt Hardy, & Jeff Hardy.
Rating: **3/4
FTR are here and they’re not happy with losing. They’re even less happy with the Gunn Club. Next week, we get Gunn Club vs. FTR on Dynamite!
Match #3. Jon Moxley & Bryan Danielson with William Regal vs. The Varsity Blondes
Damnit I wish we could have gotten the Varsity Blondes entrance music. Julia Hart has an eye patch over her eye and she kind of looks like I’d assume Sister Abigail looks. Danielson and Moxley are just so fun. Garrison in control early with a splash in the corner and some body shots in the corner. Moxley grabs a boot and dumps Garrison with a German suplex. Danielson in and he’s torturing Garrison. Danielson with a surf board as Moxley comes in and chops the prone chest of Garrison. Have I mentioned how much I love Moxley and Danielson as a tag team? Moxley drapes Garrison over the top rope and Danielson delivers a knee drop from the top rope. Garrison escapes the clutches of Danielson and tags Pillman. Forearms by Pillman and a corner lariat. Jackhammer by Pillman! Two count. Springboard by Pillman but Danielson catches him with a kick. King Kong lariat/release German suplex combo by Danielson and Moxley! That was BRUTAL. Garrison makes the save for Pillman. Big boot by Garrison and a Hart Attack with a dropkick for a two count on Moxley. Danilson is in and delivers a psycho knee to Pillman as Moxley catches Garrison coming off the top with a Paradigm Shift! Moxley with some mounted elbow as Danielson stomps the potatoes out of Pillman. That’s another win in the books. This was the perfect showing for all parties involved. Danielson and Moxley are one of the best parts of AEW right now and the Varsity Blondes are a young team that are elevated by being in the ring with these guys.
Winners: Jon Moxley & Bryan Danielson
Rating: **1/2
Moxley has the mic and says he and Danielson have forged a bond in combat. Lord William Regal is the only man that both Moxley and Danielson care about. If you want a badge of honor from the Blackpool Combat Club, there’s only one way to get it, and that’s the hard way. THIS RULES SO HARD.
MJF is here and says it’s a shame Wardlow couldn’t get the job done. S T F U chant rings out in the arena. MJF honors his agreements unlike Wardlow. MJF wants to talk to CM Punk now. The white trash hillbilly hicks know that Punk was beat at Revolution. and Punk had to cheat to win. MJF doesn’t know where or when, but there will be another match. MJF says after he embarrasses Punk it still won’t be over. It won’t be over until MJF attends Punk’s funeral and pisses on his grave. Yikes. Back to Wardlow, who MJF will now call “pig.” Crowd chants for Wardlow. If it wasn’t for MJF the people would have no idea who he is. MJF made Wardlow. MJF gave Wardlow a roof over his head. Wardlow signed a deal with the devil, and all the devil’s deals are ironclad. Wardlow’s life is going to be a living hell now. Crowd chants “Jesus”. MJF says he will strap Wardlow to a cross just like Jesus. MJF calls Wardlow’s mother a pig. Here comes the big guy, who absolutely decimates security until reinforcements come. “You don’t work for AEW, you work for MJF. And MJF doesn’t want you around here no more.” MJF is going to keep paying Wardlow, but he’s going to pay him to stay home for years to come until everyone forgets about Wardlow. Apparently people think The Pinnacle is over and done with, but now it’s stronger than ever, starting next week when FTR take on the Gunn Club. “When you’re in the Pinnacle, you’re always on top.”
In the back, Trent? says he never liked Wheeler Yuta, and he’s done with him. Yuta says he never liked Trent? either, and he’s not trying to be the best “friend” he can be, he’s trying to be the best wrestler he can be.
Match #4. Adam Cole vs. Jay Lethal
It’s kind of crazy there’s a wrestling show that in the span of 63 minutes, has featured Bryan Danielson, Jon Moxley, CM Punk, FTR, String, Matt Hardy, Jeff Hardy, and Adam Cole. What a great time to be a wrestling fan. Jay Lethal is one of the best professional wrestlers on the planet that doesn’t get enough recognition. “Let’s go Lethal!”/”Adam Cole!” dueling chants to start. Hip toss followed by a basement dropkick by Lethal. Lethal with a dropkick to Cole that sends him outside. Lethal follows up with a trio of dives to the outside as reDRagon appears on the ramp. The distraction gives Cole the upper hand as he hits a neck breaker in the center of the ring. Cole dumps lethal into the turnbuckle a few times and it’s CHIN LOCK CITY, BAY BAY. Lethal fights up, enziguiri! Jack knife pin attempt by Lethal, followed by a figure four leg lock attempt. Roll through by Cole. Roll through by Lethal. Small package. Lethal rolls through, figure four! reDRagon are now down at ringside as Cole gets to the ropes. reDRagon with the distraction to Lethal, super kick by Cole! Cole looking to lower The Boom but gets caught with a cutter by Lethal! Lethal Injection… Cole counters with a super kick to the back of the head! Panama Sunrise and that’s got to be it… NO! Crowd is ALIVE! Cole tries to lower The Boom again, but Lethal counters with a roll up! reDRagon are here to distract the referee as Lethal has him beat! Lethal tries the Lethal Injection again only to be caught with a low blow! Referree doesn’t see it. Cole lowers The Boom. That’s it. What a match, these guys can do no wrong and I’d love to see them get another ten minutes.
Winner: Adam Cole
Rating: ***1/2
Cole has the microphone. Nobody in AEW deserves the title more than Cole. Cole saw fear in Hangman’s eyes last week. Hangman caught lightning in a bottle at Revolution and the next time Cole sees him, he’s going to shove that bottle up his ass. Hangman is a coward and doesn’t have the guts to face the three of them man to man, to man, to man, I guess. Here comes Hangman. It’s three on one and we’re starting at each other in the center of the ring. Page takes his belt off and starts whipping everyone! Cole with a low blow and now Hangman is getting mugged. Here comes Jurassic Express to make the save, as Cole leaves with Hangman’s title.
Back from break and we’re in the ring with Tay Conti and Sammy Guevara. Judging by appearances only, these two should be heels. Sammy said he will give the fans a show every time he gets in the ring. Sammy says the bumps he’s taking are worth it because the fans give to him like he gives to them. Conti on the mic. “Bitch, you’re going to get your ass kicked, just like you did your whole fighting career.” Here comes Dan Lambert. Excellent. Lambert wearing the other TNT title is great, great stuff. Lambert says no way will Paige VanZant make towns in a place like Texas. Lambert calls Conti “LuchaWhoreus.. “Dan if you only knew what Tay and I did while wearing that belt, you’d know we’re living in your mouth too.”
A video package lets us know that it’s Swerve vs. Ricky Starks this Friday on Dynamite.
Match #5. Leyla Hirsch vs. Red Velvet
Kris Statlander is barred from ringside. Velvet is on the apron showing off as Hirsch attacks with a dropkick. On the outside, Velvet chops Hirsch and throws her face first into the barricade. Velvet with a step up hurricanrana off the stairs! That was cool. Velvet attacks Hirsch in the corner. Standing moonsault by Velvet by Hirsch grabs a body lock and delivers a gut wrench suplex as we’re headed to a commercial. Back from break and Velvet delivers some double knees and we have an incredibly awkward strike-for-strike spot ending with a German suplex by Velvet. Iconoclasm by Velvet (even though she didn’t cross the arms) to Hirsch following by the tiger kick. Hirsch rolls to the outside and drops Velvet’s arm on the apron. Hirsch goes under the ring to grab the turnbuckle apparatus, but the referee sees it and removes it from the ring. Hirsch has another one in her trunks and drops Velvet with it, and that does it. Rough go of it here, lots of miscommunication. I think Hirsch would benefit from a mouthpiece, Taz, perhaps?
Winner: Leyla Hirsch
Rating: **
Kris Statlander is here, and she gets rid of Hirsch.
Jade wants money falling from the sky, confetti, Lamborghini’s, and more for her 30th victory celebration.
reDRagon vs. 5 & 10 and Nyla Rose will be in action on Rampage. Next week on Dynamite, FTR vs. The Gunn Club, and Andrade vs. Darby Allin!
Thunder Rosa is here to celebrate her win with Tony Schiavone, but “EXCUSE ME!” Vickie Guerrero is here. Don’t insult Vickie’s state. Rosa gets her microphone and here’s Nyla Rose to attack Rosa from behind. Guerrero says Rose is hungrier and thirstier for the title. How many times will Nyla Rose be defeated in her attempts to win the title?
Match #6. Jericho Appreciation Society (Daniel Garcia & Chris Jericho) vs. Dark Order (John Silver & Alex Reynolds)
They may not like Jericho, but they do sure love to sing Judas. The JAS says there should be no more Judas because the fans don’t appreciate it. That’s a fair point. Jericho starts by talking down to John Silver, but Silver rebounds with some European uppercuts and a huge body slam. Double bicep pose by Silver on a prone Jericho! Big moment for him there. Double drop toe hold by Dark Order and stereo dropkicks to Jericho. Crowd is rabid for this one. Silver follows Jericho outside and delivers a strong roundhouse to the mid section. Suicide dive/brain buster combination by Dark Order on the outside to Jericho! Elevated assisted European uppercut on the inside to Garcia! Jericho feigns a headshot by the Dark Order as Aubrey Edwards orders the Dark Order to the back. Jericho back in control with a scoop slam on Reynolds. Reynolds catches Jericho in mid air with a dropkick and both men are down. Jericho gets the tag to Garcia and it’s a suplex party (is that a thing?). European uppercuts to Reynolds and a quick tag back to Jericho. Lionsault misses! Reynolds tags Silver and the man is on FIRE. Clotheslines to Jericho and a flapjack. Cannonball to Garcia on the outside! Dropkicks to Matt and Parker! Hurricanrana to Hager! Back on the inside Jericho catches Silver with a code breaker! Quick tag to Garcia and here’s Reynolds. Enziguiri/stunner/half and half/jackknife combo by Dark Order! 1, 2, no! Silver with a dive to Hager on the outside by Hager catches him and slams him on the outside! Reynolds off the ropes by Jericho grabs Floyd the bat and cracks Reynolds in the middle of the back! Reynolds hits the ground and Garcia locks in the sharpshooter and that’s it! JAS just beat the number one tag team! Really fun match here with the continued push of the Jericho Appreciation Society, and Daniel Garcia is benefitting huge in the process.
Winners: Chris Jericho & Daniel Garcia
Rating: ***
Credit: WrestlingHeadlines.com
